The Carl Online

‘09: Redux! A 2011 Awards Season Preview by carlmagazine
September 28, 2010, 9:11 am
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By Josiah Burns

I know we still have a few months till the domestic awards season, but it’s time to hedge your bets. The word is in from Cannes, Toronto, Telluride, and Venice. With Fincher, Boyle, Aronofsky, and a pair of pint-sized vampires vying for end-of-year honors, it’s a flashback to the year of the Slumdog Millionaire. Call me crazy, but my money’s on The Social Network, Fincher’s most recent effort, the already (in)famous Zuckerberg biopic.

127 Hours (Danny Boyle): A man suffers from lightheadedness and is rushed to the hospital. Another has a panic attack in the lobby. Step aside, The Exorcist and Blair Witch. These were some of the headlines after 127 Hours premiered at Telluride. In telling the true story of Aron Ralston (James Franco), Boyle takes the Aristotelian unities to an extreme, intensely documenting the escape of a stranded climber (fortunately, he condenses the narrative into ninety minutes).

Black Swan (Darren Aronofsky): Judging by the trailer, Natalie Portman’s ballerina protagonist goes on an hour-and-a-half schizo-acid trip. Aronofsky seems to marry the psychological intensity of π with twelve years of Hollywood experience. Clint Mansell’s score (a sort of deconstructed Swan Lake) sounds amazing. Hopefully this one doesn’t get destroyed by The Hobbit trailer.

Biutiful (Alejandro González Iñárritu): As a director, Iñárritu has a lot to prove. Both Amores Perros and 21 Grams are outstanding, but you couldn’t pay me to watch Babel again. The question everyone’s asking: Does Javier Bardem + four years to recover from cringe-inducing Oscar bait = success? While it doesn’t quite seem like a Chighur-caliber performance, I’ll risk it.

The Fighter (David O. Russell): David O. Russell is a huge douchebag. He once made a decent movie (Three Kings), and even then, George Clooney (really?) nearly quit the set after a fistfight with the director. With I Heart Huckabees, he shamed the cinematic medium. But I have a huge soft-spot for Marky-Mark (who’s already getting some Best Actor talk). Given boxing films’ surprising track record with The Academy (including Best Pictures winners Rocky, Raging Bull, and Million Dollar Baby), this one’ll be around in March.

Jack-Ass 3D: With 3D that promises to shame Clash of the Titans and The Last Airbender, Jack-Ass 3D is pretty self-explanatory. Those expensive red and green glasses couldn’t even make me care about the Na’vi and their planet Pandora. But for Johnny Knoxville and company? Let the port-a-potties fly!

Let Me In (Matt Reeves): This film shouldn’t exist in the first place, and I kind of hate myself for putting it on this list. But hey, Hollywood remade Let the Right One In. And the trailer’s actually really good. Just as long as I don’t get too pissed at the annoying kid from The Road, I think this’ll be pretty enjoyable.

The Social Network (David Fincher): Fincher is probably the most technically precise and adept director in Hollywood. The only barrier between Benjamin Button and cinematic bliss is a good screenplay (because I think it’s a really bad one). Even though I never want to hear any version of Creep for a really long time, the trailer’s pretty damn good. Trent Reznor’s doing the score.
J-Timbo’s getting Best Supporting Actor buzz. Get ready.

Somewhere (Sofia Coppola): Sofia is the best Coppola in Hollywood today (and I’ll take a ‘70s Francis over anyone). Starring Stephen Dorff and Elle Fanning, Somewhere won the Golden Lion over a tough crowd in Venice. Set in Hollywood, the semi-autobiographical plot is somewhat inspired by Sofia’s own upbringing on her father’s film sets.

True Grit (The CoBros): If anyone else tried to remake the 1969 True Grit, I would not be happy. But I’m convinced that the Coen Brothers are the smartest directors working in Hollywood. They’re probably up to something pretty genius. If Jeff Bridges wins back-to-back Best Actor statues, it might make up for The Dude’s snub.

Odds and Ends by Alex Sciuto
June 13, 2009, 4:09 pm
Filed under: PDF Posts | Tags: , , , , , ,

I know this site has died, and I take most of the blame for the CarlBlog going dormant, but this is my attempt to make ammends. Here are two issues of the Carl 09. I would have put the other four issues not yet on the internet, but security won’t let me into the Carl office and someone from facilites has already swiped the key.

New Executive Editors will no doubt do better than I have done to make this site real.



-Alex Sciuto

Friday Feb 13 Carl by carlmagazine



02 EDITORS’ NOTE Prescience and struggle in the face of meaninglessness
03 DOORMAT Words for the trustees • More stuff freshmen like • Vagina dialogues
05 SOCIETY Long distance relationships: stories and strategies • How to have an alternative Valentines Day
09 ARTS & LIT Just in time for your lonely Saturday, some scintillating romance novel reviews
10 FEATURE Graffiti at Carleton: a comprehensive history
14 PERFORMANCES Talking with the cast and grew of The House of Seven Gables
16 MUSIC Franz Ferdinand’s latest: what’s the Scottish word for misstep? • What does a film prof listen to? • Aaron Kaufman looks into a dark mirror
18 CINEMA He’s Just Not That Into You: it’s not a chick flick if it’s got Affleck, bro • Andrew Tatge on noise and movie trailers
20 CARTOONS We make Winsor McCay look like a stupid jerk
22 FUN & GAMES You choose the next Vinayak!
23 COUNTDOWN Chun-Li, local hip-hop, and avoiding sterility

Best Carl Ever by carlmagazine

Best. Carl. Ever. Period. Two timely features. Erudite Reviews. And World War III: Carleton College v. Carleton University.

CARL 1/30/09


01 EDITORS’ NOTE Prescience and struggle in the face of meaninglessness
03 DOORMAT Carlemaggedon starts here – we demand our name back from Carleton University!
06 SOCIETY Orion Martin’s inauguration misadventure • Jordan Narvey on the importance of broomball • Momma mia! Sex and Mario Bros
08 SPECIAL DOUBLE FEATURE: Comps, for the uninitiated • Surveying the controversy over Bon Appetit at Carleton
15 ARTS & LIT Sasha Korobova on the libe’s latest installation • James Hannaway talks to Dan Lacey, Minnesota’s foremost political painter
18 MUSIC Lil Wayne’s “Prom Queen” – horrible or terrible? • Andrew Bird lays a turd • Russ Petricka’s top tracks
20 CINEMA Notorious: a dialogic review • Frank Firke spends Christmas on Mars
22 PERFORMANCES Faust comes to the cities • How cool was Cooler Ranch’s debut?
23 CARTOONS A whole lotta Jenna MacKrell • Makando Z gets complicated
26 FUN & GAMES It’s a letter ‘Z’-themed word search. Why? Because we can. • Things Barack Obama will make cool again, in the Bracket
27 COUNTDOWN What is this “super-bowl”? Max Bearack and Frank Firke explain

Winter Term Carl PDFs! by carlmagazine
January 18, 2009, 8:30 pm
Filed under: PDF Posts | Tags: , , , , , ,

We’re back with the first magazine of cheery winter season! Make sure to check out the cover because it looks a lot better in pdf form. Eventually, I hope that we’ll master the fine art of lightening every picture and graphic on the computer that it comes out as pretty in print as it does on the screen, but for now enjoy wowing at it on the COMPUTER!


CARL 01-16-09


02 EDITORS’ NOTE – Prescience and struggle in the face of meaninglessness

03 DOORMAT – For the benefit of those who where abroad, Matt Pieh presents a synopsis of Penisgate ‘08 • Libertarianism and you

05 PERFORMANCES – The Guthrie does Albee, and Mandy Zoch reports • Winter ‘09 previews

06 SOCIETY – Sex and food, or ‘Remember that Seinfeld episode?’ • The next time you consider asking out your chem lab crush, maybe you should grow up first

08 FEATURE – Dan Sugarman talks to Randy Peck, punk rock Santa

10 MUSIC – Sting gives President Oden the creeps • Kyle Kramer likes the new Animal Collective, cultural implications be damned

12 ARTS & LIT – Alex Sciuto sees the world’s most expensive painting • Sasha Korobova gets melodramatic • Greg Hunter reads Krazy Kat

14 CINEMA – Andreas Stoehr loves esoteric films, and he doesn’t care who it hurts • Gomorra’s Italian gangsters shake down Andrew Tatge

16 FUN & GAMES – It’s the student journalism equivalent of Jordan playing for the Wizards: The Bracket is back!

17 COUNTDOWN – It’s Biggie vs. Blagojevich in a battle for your attention


-Alex Sciuto

Wow, Another Carl PDF by carlmagazine
November 10, 2008, 5:43 pm
Filed under: PDF Posts | Tags: , , , ,

You might have already leafed through the print version of the Carl, but I sure hope you download the e-version. You see, late on every other Wednesday night as Greg, Dan, and I are finishing up laying-out the Carl, we usually have a few moments where we just wow at how pretty the whole magazine looks. The text is crisp, the background is bleach white, and the photos are all correctly contrasted and balanced. It never looks as good in on newsprint as it does on computer screens. So download it and you can see the Carl in all its perfection.

11-07-08 CARL

-Alex Sciuto

From the Archives: Exit 69 Competition Review by carlmagazine
October 9, 2008, 6:23 pm
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Exit 69 Doesn’t Sell Out by Ann Busiek

The weekend of February 11, Exit 69, Carleton’s most schizophrenic co-ed a cappella group, sang at the International Championship of College A Cappella (ICCA, to those in the know) Midwest Divisional in romantic, enchantic Decatur, Illinois. We sent in audition tapes last spring, scrounged up money for the entrance fee, and spent most of this term rehearsing three songs for ICCA. This is not an article about that performance. It is about Exit 69, the open road, and why we are really better than all the groups that beat us.

On February 10, the fact that we had neglected to reserve any campus vans made itself known to us in the following fashion:

Someone: Did we reserve campus vans?

Someone else: No.

Because the Carleton administration is very kind and because Sue and Beth can be very persuasive, we  enanaged to get three last-minute rental cars and then all 13 of us piled into them on Friday afternoon after class.

I happily set my books and pillow in the passenger seat next to the driver, my dear friend Scott, and went into the snack bar to purchase malted milk balls for the journey. When I returned to the car, I was dismayed to find that my seat was being occupied and my pillow enjoyed by all six-foot-however-many-inches of Derek Zimmerman and his blond hair. There was, apparently, a perfectly good spot for me in the middle of the back seat, which consisted mostly of an uncomfortable raised-up bump of fabric. “No no,” I said. “But I have these long … Read more of Ann’s adventure

Old Carl Issues by carlmagazine
October 7, 2008, 5:34 pm
Filed under: PDF Posts

I’ve been combing through the computers in The Carl office trying to find old issues of The Carl to throw up on the internet. While it’s very time consuming work, looking at old issues is a pretty cool time machine back to when some or all of us weren’t even at Carleton, and they’re a great way to waste two afternoon hours in a computer lab. So, look to the left side-bar and enjoy.

-Alex Sciuto

Reduced Size PDFs by carlmagazine
October 4, 2008, 4:42 pm
Filed under: PDF Posts

Hey CarlGang,

I didn’t realize how huge the PDF sizes were (the New Student Week edition was 20 megabytes!). I’ve uploaded what Adobe Acrobat calls optimized pdf files, and they’re smaller. If you were trying to download the pdfs and they were just too big, well now they’re much smaller.

9/26/08 Carl by carlmagazine
September 29, 2008, 4:03 am
Filed under: PDF Posts

Loyal Carls,

We are now online!

9/26 Carl

NSW Carl